“What is this jacket made of? It feels like buttery-soft leather,” I ask. The very serious and earnest salesperson replies, “Oh, it’s made of vegan leather.” I pause for a few seconds to process the answer. “Vegan leather?” I repeat, as I try to understand what he’s saying. “You mean it isn’t real? Is it like what we used to call pleather?” A pained look is visible from behind the mask.

“It just means there were no animal products used.”

“So, it’s made of plastic then,” I say, beginning to savour the situation.

“Er, yes,” they respond.

I thought it unkind to point out that plastic is made from dinosaurs and other organic materials. The shop assistant seemed so earnest and nice. Who wants to be thought of as “that guy in the store”? Certainly not me. Besides, it was “take my daughter to lunch and then buy her stuff day.” I really didn’t want there to be a sour note.

Accompanying my daughter on a clothes shopping spree is not something to be undertaken lightly. It’s an event of titanic proportion with lots of dad-learning moments to be had along the way. It seems daughter no. 2 has been invited to a formal event at the Vancouver Art Gallery. Like you, I’m in the solution business. Her problem—namely, “I haven’t got a thing to wear”—was something I offered to solve with what I thought would be a visit to a couple of shops, along with a liberal application of much credit card plastic.

About five hours later with lunch half-way through, we had lift-off, as they say. A suitable formal dress with a side order of accoutrements, along with a pairing of shoes, handbag, and sunglasses had been bought. Naturally, the purchase was made at the very last shop, after we had tried all the other ones at Park Royal and Pacific Centre malls. Thank goodness we didn’t need to go to Tsawwassen Mills. Still, it was a fun day and a very large problem had been solved. How often does one get to say that at the end of a day?

On this outing, I was struck by how easily impressions are made when shopping, which isn’t something I do a lot of now. (Check out the giant lapels on my now too-tight suit when we all get together again to see what I mean.)

What’s the real estate equivalent of the “Just what’s out there” answer we get when we ask if a certain missing size or colour is not on the rack. Have a think and let me know. You know before you ask you’re going to get this answer, but you can’t help asking in the vain hope that, this time, there will be an XXS in chartreuse that someone forgot to hang on the rack.

Other stuff creates impressions, too, when you’re shopping: a jumble of mannequins with signs plastered all over the place tells me the shop is probably one of those where you’d have to be a detective with an electron microscope to find the clothing you might want to wear, but probably won’t. Is there a real estate advertising equivalent of that, too? Sure, there is. And if that’s what you want to do, fine. But know that you will, indeed, leave an impression, and perhaps not the best kind.

A few of the shops we visited had one elegantly dressed mannequin in the window holding one handbag, not accompanied by loud, pounding music. I’ve been to cathedrals noisier than some of these places. They’re nice though if you have someone helping you who doesn’t hover. Or someone who knows how to listen.

In one such shop, I asked, “Have you got something formal for my daughter to wear?”

“Certainly,” replied the clerk. “How about this microscopic skin-tight see-through mini-dress, suitable for giving any self-respecting dad a stroke?”

“Er, it’s a formal event,” I sputtered. “Shouldn’t the dress be about 20 inches longer?”

“How about this one?” they offered. 

It looked exactly the same as the previous one.

What’s the real estate equivalent of this one? Not listening to the client, I suppose. Or trying to force feed the client with something they just aren’t ready to hear or deal with. Yet.

I could go on. During the dog days of summer yet to come, now that Monsieur Heat Dome has left the building, have a think of all the dreary stuff we say out of habit to the questions we get. Is it time for a tune-up or, at the very least, to add a little zest to what we say?

Good impressions count. And they usually pay off with repeat and referred business. So, I was impressed with that vegan leather motorcycle jacket with the studs, poppers, patch pockets, and straps. Plus, if we had bought it, I would have had a good story to tell.

A vegan leather jacket? Who knew?

In the video below, Kim offers a reminder on our rules about respecting agency relationships and the requirement to have a licensee supervise a showing and/or inspection.